Thursday, May 22, 2014

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It's times like these that make me thankful that I have a blog. I'm not the most open person in the world and sometimes when things go sour, I tend to turn inwards and have a really hard time talking outwardly about it. But I know I can always come here and be honest and just pour my heart out in writing. It's easier for me. Maybe it's the internet, maybe it's because I feel kind of invisible here and not quite as vulnerable so I can just write freely without having to actually face anyone. Writing helps me a lot, to vent and to get things inside my head out so that they're not all bottled up and I don't explode on someone. But even though I feel like I can sometimes hide behind the internet, there's also a support system here for me. At the time I started this blog, I was a mostly "stay at home mom". My friends lived hours away and I had no one to talk to day after day, week after week. I probably would have gone crazy if I didn't start up this blog and my business to give me something to do besides school and baby. Because it's been a real outlet for me. I know I can come here and be honest and someone will understand. The comments I get here and there really mean a lot to me. It means a lot that a stranger has the courage to reach out to me and send me kind words. I know I have some family and friends that read this blog and that is nice too. I don't know, I guess it's just nice to know that even though it's hard for me to talk to people about my problems I will always have this blog to turn to and someone here will listen. And that's consolation enough. It's been difficult for me to be appreciative about things lately when I feel so detached from everything, but I'm working on it. So I am grateful for you all and having this place to come to always. That is my joy today. 

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